Tom of France

He hates being called daddy. So call him SIR or don’t call him at all! WINGS had the pleasure to sit down with one of our favorite kinksters on Instagram: Tom of France.

Tom of France is a happily married man. Together with his husband (and occasional sex toy) he lives on a farm, in the countryside, in an area called the Valley of the Kings. He’s surrounded by fields, forests, deer, and rabbits.

Tom: (laughs) “But I’m not a farmer!”

What do you do then?

Tom: “I have a small web agency and I’m a graphic designer. I do posters, DVD covers, drawings… Most of our customers are gay. We do a lot of work for the French porn industry, but also for a national gay TV channel.”

Does that mean you do your photography yourself as well?

Tom: “Yes, all by myself in my living room. I push all the furniture aside and use black and white paper to change the backgrounds. It’s difficult doing it alone, but it’s also a lot of fun. I use Photoshop to add my name in the pics – like a signature – or to tweak the light. But I don’t alter my body and I don’t want to hide my wrinkles.”

What are your criteria for a great fetish picture?

Tom: (amused) “Well…I prefer wearing the strict minimum in pics. But sometimes I go all out and wear everything, full BLUF. On Instagram, you never know what is going to be the best photo. Sometimes I post something that’s just ok to me and then people go crazy for it. And then I post a pic, which I think is really hot, and then people’s reaction is lukewarm. I’ve decided never to ask my followers because they never give me the answer I want to hear. I appreciate their comments, but I do what I like and what I feel.”

How did you come up with your name?

Tom: “My name is of course an homage to Tom of Finland. I don’t consider myself a Tom of Finland man, but at one point a lot of people thought I looked like his characters. So, I became Tom of France. I want to broadcast that same kind of energy. My pics need to be sexy, strong, masculine, if possible with a little bit of humor. For me, the leather scene is also theatre. You play a role. Followers always want to know if I’m dressed in leather all day. They dream about that. But Instagram is just a fantasy. And I like it that way. I live in a small provincial town. I can’t wear full leather outside; people would throw rocks at me hahaha.”

It’s not like you are living in Berlin, in the Motzstrasse, the vibe there is a bit different…

Tom: “When I’m in Berlin I’m in leather 24 hours a day. I feel like a Victorian lady when I’m there. I have an outfit for the day, an outfit for the cocktail, and an outfit for going out at night. I absolutely love it!”

What is your favorite pic on your Instagram account?

Tom: “I made a picture of myself smoking a cigar – I just discovered the joy of smoking them. I’m in a white jockstrap, black leather chaps, with my head looking down a bit. It was a lucky shot, but I think it’s really beautiful. I also like to have fun with captions. There’s a recent pic where I’m looking at the contents of my pants. The caption says: ‘So nice for my lovers, so small for my haters.’”

Let’s talk gear. What are your favorite pieces?

Tom: “I love chaps. I own the leather convertible pants from Mister B. You can wear them as leather jeans or turn them into chaps. They’re practical and very sexy. I also love police caps. I have one with a silver trim and one with a gold trim – I love that metal look. Every time I order new gear it’s really expensive, but when it arrives I’m sooooo happy, and I immediately think of new things that would go with it. At the moment I’m waiting for a leather jacket I ordered from Langlitz. I can’t express how excited I am waiting for it. It feels like Christmas!”

Looking at your pics it’s obvious what your kinks are. Could you tell us about your likes and dislikes in the playroom?

Tom: “I’m dominant, but I don’t think I’m extremely hard. I like flogging, but not until it bleeds. I like to push my sub to his limits. I don’t want to force him to go over them or make him cry and I like my sessions to be silent. I don’t like to talk or swear when I’m playing. The look I give my sub should be communication enough. I’m the master, you are the boy. You worship me. You lick my boots. You do what I want you to do to please me.”

Final question: you don’t like to be called daddy. Why is that?

Tom: “I know I’m old and that’s not a problem for me. I’m going to be 58 in a few days… But the idea of a dad-son-relationship just doesn’t appeal to me. The word daddy reminds me too much of Marilyn Monroe: ‘My heart belongs to daddy.’ I just can’t stand it. Call me grey or old. I don’t mind, I mean, I’m definitely not a twink hahaha.”

 Tom is BLUF member 3632. You can check out his page on Instagram @tom_of_france and if you meet him in public say hello. He might look aggressive, but he’s just a bit shy and French!